Who is first born?

From the book: Ibeji - The Cult of Yoruba Twins
Yoruba mother holding her twins.
Town of Share, North Oyo
Photgraph by Deborah Stokes (1980)

In today's topic we want to talk about birth order.
By birth order we are referring to the age old question of "Who is the first born?"
For many years we believed the first born title belongs to the one who entered into the world first; but over the years we have learned that this is not the only belief system.











One example comes from the Yoruba tribe:
Yoruba twins are named according to their birth order, with the firstborn twin called Taiyewo (shortened to Taiwo) meaning ‘the first to taste the world’, and the second-born twin called Kehinde, ‘the last to come’. These are their ‘celestial’ Yoruba names dictated by their birth circumstances.
When the twins are born, Kehinde sends Taiwo to check out what life is like on earth and to tell him or her whether it will be good. Therefore, Taiwo becomes the first child to be born. He/she then communicates to Kehinde spiritually, through the nature of his/her crying, whether life will be good or bad. The reply determines if Kehinde will be born alive or stillborn. Both twins will be stillborn, returning to where they came from, if Taiwo’s reply is not good enough for both of them. The Yoruba traditionally say that Kehinde is the true elder of the twins despite being the second-born, because Kehinde sends Taiwo on an errand, a prerogative of one’s elders in Yoruba land. - hornbled.com, The birth of twins.

The very first time we heard this, there was a struggle because growing up we understood the opposite. And this soon became a topic of concern and one we would question often, especially when birth order views were brought up. After a long while we decided we had to come to an understanding for ourselves; as for each culture we cannot say is wrong. The health of our relationship depended on it as it forms a part of our identity; not only that ,but it challenged the dynamics of our relationship.

What made this process more confusing for us was the fact that we are born in Africa, as well as hearing the older Portuguese generations agreeing with this belief. This especially came as a surprise to us.

After much discussion and assessing we came to our decisions, which is the first to come into the world is the one who would be first born; and that he/she will hold the rights of being the first born. This was the way we had been brought up to understand and this is also the way we have seen many twins and triplets function.

There have been times where people have told us about their cultural beliefs that was new and exciting, and then some not as exciting. It was easy for us to feel offended when we were challenged on our birth roles. One thing we have learned at TwinningIt is to not take offense to different cultural views; but instead celebrate it. The humans race is incredibly diverse and curious and that is what makes life such a beautiful experience. For us that is 100% okay.

Let us know how your culture see's the birth order system. You can Facebook us or Tweet us
We would love to hear from you.